Pukeko

A Silly Little Thing / Kind of Cosmic / Forkjam Entry

A Character Sketch of a Certain Pukeko in Three Conversations About Her- #1 "You know, I think such a being would have to be... a bird." "A bird? Like a phoenix or... I don't know, is a gryphon a bird? Like that?" "No, no. Actually, something that looks after us like that would have to be not majestic. It'd have to be a silly little thing." "Huh. Why is that? Oh my God, I'm already imagining a kiwi or some silly thing, waddling around, giving random people blessings and some shit." "Pfft. Well, okay, what I mean is... So this... some benevolent spirit of the universe that protects us and wants the best for us. When we talk about it like that, it means this spirit cares about even the little things. Not just big dramatic things like sin or crime or whatever. Little things, like whether we turned off the gas before leaving or how long we stare at a park squirrel before it gets weird or... you know? The trivial things." "Okay. Sure. Go on?" "If this being was a fantastic, majestic creature, you'd be like... oh no, a great being is watching me. I have to be more than myself right now. Now what I'm saying is... That's not benediction or salvation. Instead that's supervision. That's subjugation. So, to be truly something that just... wants the best for us and has our back, it has to be small enough and boring enough that it can let us just be." "That's... Weird. But I kinda get it? Like the whole Superman dealio, you know? Is he allowing us be our best or is he forcing us to be our best? I don't know how the exact argument goes, it's too nerdy for me, but... something along that line." "Um. Okay. Sure. Yeah. A being that watches over us because it wants us to be all right? It can't give us mercy. It can't demand us to be always our best. It has to accept us to be always just ourselves." #2 "Hey bro. This is going to sound gay but I was just thinking... Man, it would be awesome if we stuck around together forever." "That sounds hella gay, man. And, like, oh man, please fuck no. I mean, I love you, man, but do you even know what you are wishing for?" "Dude, stop being so homophobic. It's cool to be a little gay nowadays. I'm just saying, you are such an awesome friend for me that it'd be cool if, you know, it didn't fuck up somehow." "Bro, forever is scary shit. Like, that's the point. Forever is scary. I know this because... My grandpa? He was with grams for 70 years before he passed." "Oh, dude. That's true love, man." "I guess it must've been. That's why it's scary as shit. My grandma passed two years before he did and... Man, I visited the old man after the funeral and he was just... Worse than dead." "Fuck, man. He must've taken it hard. Losing a loved one is never easy." "Now, bro. Imagine if my grandpa had to go on for so much longer after that. Years and years of... not knowing why you are still here? Wondering where everyone went?" "I mean, shit, that sounds harsh. But seriously man. If we are real as shit, we won't lose one another, man." "Pffft. Dude, if we were stuck forever as we are now, that's not forever, that's just now over and over. Change is the whole deal." "Fuck you, man. Fucking nerdass cunt. I hate your ass." #3 "What would you do, if those superpowers you mentioned were yours?" "What'd I do? Uh... you mean, what if I could pop out swords out of my body, set things on fire just whenever I want, and create shadow copies of myself? Like the superheroes I talked about?" "Exactly. What would you do?" "I... Uh, if I really think about it... I would... do nothing, honestly." "Why is that? Why would you do nothing when you can chop down anything, burn away things and create illusions of yourself?" "Well. Um. Because... because if I, a real person, had those powers... Well, I would still be myself, you know? And not a comic book superhero?" "Perhaps. Can you tell me more about what you are thinking about?" "Okay, I think this is a better way to explain it. Like, already, as a human, I have lots of superpowers. I can use tools. I can think smarter than almost any other animal. I can throw things. I can run, too, if the weather's nice enough. But, despite that... not all people are out there doing amazing things. Maybe it wouldn't be amazing if everyone did it, but you know what I mean." "I think I do, but let's continue this thought for a bit." "Yeah. So... So say I have those superpowers we talked about. Just being able to do those amazing things doesn't mean I have a reason to use them. I could be made of katanas, shoot eye beams at ten thousand kelvins, have ninja shadows, whatever, and I would still be myself. I would drink my little cola, play my little games, play with my little puppy, and live my little life." "So I get the impression that... Just having new abilities and capabilities wouldn't alter your daily life? Is that correct?" "Well... Maybe I would do things differently if different things happened. Like, if I saw someone get mugged or aliens started invading or something, then I would have to do something with my superpowers. I would be obliged, honestly." "Like what Uncle Ben said?" "I... I guess. He did say 'great responsibility', not 'great loss of yourself'."